Rpg Maker GAMES
3 Rpg Maker games await on this page, from casual browser picks to longer stories.
- glenn quagmire▶ INSERT COIN
Lucky Guy: A Parody of Family Guy Series
The first thing that hits you isn't the tits, it's the music. Some royalty free jazz loop that sounds like it was recorded in a damp basement, and it just keeps going. I sat on the title screen for maybe two minutes, hypnotized by how aggressively cheap it sounded. That's the whole experience, really. This is an RPGMaker thing, a parody of that cartoon with the dog and the fat guy, you know the one. You're some nobody who works for Quagmire, and he sends you on errands. The whole premise is that following his instructions leads to sex scenes with the neighborhood women. The sprite for Lois is this bizarre redheaded block with a face that sort of looks like her if you squint and have a concussion. Bonnie is there too, and Meg, and Jillian. The dialogue is written by someone whose first language is definitely not English, and it's got this accidental poetry to it. A character once told me "the passion is burn in my loins" and I haven't stopped thinking about it. The actual gameplay is just walking left and right, talking to people, hitting confirm. There's a part where you have to find a specific item in Quagmire's house and I clicked on every single identical bookshelf for three minutes. Why is his house a maze of empty corridors. The sex scenes are these static images with text boxes. The one with Lois on the kitchen table has this weird filter over it, like vaseline on a camera lens, and the writing describes things with the clinical detachment of a medical textbook. "He inserted his member into her womanhood." I don't know why that phrase made me laugh so hard I had to stop playing for a bit. The Jillian scene is just confusing, she keeps talking about something unrelated and then suddenly it's over. I wish there was more of the actual weirdness of the show, the cutaway gags or the non-sequiturs, but it's just a straight porn delivery system with the characters' faces crudely pasted on. The whole thing feels like a fever dream you'd have after eating bad pizza and passing out with the TV on.
- big boobs▶ INSERT COIN
Unmasking Julia
John and Julia have just moved to a new neighborhood, eager to start their life together. But instead of living in a spacious, upscale home, they're crammed into a tiny, run-down shack. Julia quickly realizes that living on so little is harder than she thought, especially since her husband seems too laid-back to hunt for a decent-paying job. So she decides to take matters into her own hands, using her charm and body to get by. Her voluptuous figure – those perfectly round breasts and firm, tempting ass – quickly become the center of attention wherever she goes. Before long, Julia launches into a provocative career as a sexual model, exposing herself to the world and embracing the raw, unfiltered side of desire. What started as desperation soon turns into a thrilling exploration of control, power, and submission. As you step into Julia's shoes, you'll navigate this intense lifestyle, balancing vulnerability and strength while climbing from hardship to success. Experience the adrenaline rush as she attracts clients, poses for steamy shoots, and flirts with dangerous pleasure at every turn. Dive into a story of passion, resilience, and risqué ambition where only one thing matters: how far Julia is willing to go to claim a better life. Are you ready to take charge and experience Julia’s electrifying rise from poverty to provocative fame? Jump in now and let her story unravel in the most enticing ways imaginable.
- groping▶ INSERT COIN
Unmasking Julia v4.0
Look, the mask stays on during sex. That's rule one and the game never lets you forget it, which is hilarious because it's clearly just a sprite edit of a default RPG Maker face with some black pixels slapped on. Julia's whole deal is this weird confidence thing where she's like a superhero of getting railed, and the game leans so hard into the "mystery" angle that it wraps around to being accidentally funny. You got your standard village, your standard cave, your standard slime that somehow knows how to grope. The combat is whatever. You hit things, they hit you, but the loss scenes. Oh man the loss scenes. There's this one with a plant monster that I swear the dev spent three weeks on and then the actual final boss is just a dude in a cloak who does the most generic vaginal sex animation in the history of the engine. The teasing tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting here because half the game is Julia going "ooh, maybe I shouldn't" and then immediately doing it anyway. The lesbian content is actually more interesting than the straight stuff, there's a thief character who shows up like twice and their scene has more personality than anything with the male NPCs. The humor is accidental I think. The writing tries so hard to be sexy and mysterious that it becomes this beautiful trainwreck of mixed metaphors. One minute Julia's giving a speech about her hidden identity, next minute she's getting a creampie from a goblin. The threesome scene is bugged, by the way. If you trigger it in the wrong order the third character just stands there facing the wall. Never got patched. The oral sex animations are recycled from like three different asset packs and you can tell because the art style shifts mid-scene. But somehow that jank makes it better? Like finding a bootleg DVD where the subtitles are for a completely different movie. The graphic violence tag is for exactly one scene where someone gets stabbed and it's so out of place I laughed out loud. The RPG Maker community has this whole ecosystem of these games and Julia's Mask or whatever it's actually called is perfectly mid-tier. Not the worst, definitely not the best, but it has that specific energy of a dev who really wanted to make something cool and just... didn't quite get there. I respect it.