Candy Supermarket - Chocolate

The whole thing is a mess of forms and a test subject who looks like he's about to pass out before anything even happens. You're in this candy shop, right, but it's not the kind with striped awnings and a friendly owner. It's more like a backroom deal where the chocolate might kill you. The guy has to sign a waiver. A waiver! For chocolate. That's the level of stupid humor we're dealing with, and honestly, it got me. The text is deliberately rough, like someone typed it with one hand while giggling, and the art has that unpolished, almost scrawled quality that somehow makes the big tits look even more absurd. The oral scene is where it gets properly messy. The chocolate is the catalyst, obviously, and the whole thing plays out like a bad porno parody of Willy Wonka. The strapon comes out later, and the animation, if you can call it that, is janky as hell. But there's a commitment to the bit. The cumshot isn't just a visual, it's a punchline. The sound design is basically nonexistent, just some wet slaps that cut out abruptly. I spent way too long trying to figure out if the chocolate bar on the counter changed color after the first test. It didn't. I checked three times. I kept thinking about that waiver form. It's just sitting there on the screen for a while, and the text on it is genuinely funny, full of legal nonsense about "penis implosion." That's the kind of detail that sticks with you more than the actual fucking. The big tits are there, they're fine, they bounce in a way that defies the game's own physics. But the real star is the absurd premise. It's a game that knows it's a joke and doesn't try to be anything else. The oral scene is sloppy in a good way, the strapon segment feels like it was animated by someone who just learned what keyframes are, and the whole thing ends with a splat. I forgot to mention the candy shop setting is basically one room. That's it. One room and a dream.

• funny
• big tits
• cumshot
• candy shop
• strap-on