Hollywood whores

The Price is Right theme is playing but it's wrong somehow, like a MIDI file that's been corrupted by a virus you got from Limewire. Charlie's there in the front row, and honestly the artist clearly spent about 80% of their polygon budget on her chest. No complaints. The whole thing feels like a fever dream where you're watching daytime TV after skipping your meds. The host is this B-list actor whose name I've already forgotten but his smile doesn't reach his eyes and there's something deeply wrong with how the audience members clip through their seats. You're supposed to help Charlie win prizes by doing these minigames that are basically just clicking things until numbers go up. The first challenge is guessing prices for household appliances and if you win, Charlie's top gets progressively more strained. Revolutionary gameplay. Truly pushing the medium forward. There's this one moment where she's spinning this giant wheel and the physics engine just gives up entirely, her hair starts vibrating like it's trying to escape her scalp, and I laughed so hard I nearly choked on my drink. The whole thing is broken in ways that make it better. You're not here for the game design, you're here because someone decided to make a porn parody of game shows and committed to the bit hard enough that it wraps back around to being almost profound. Almost. The celebrity cameos are all legally distinct enough to avoid lawsuits but you know exactly who they're supposed to be. One of them is definitely the guy from that 90s sitcom who now sells reverse mortgages on cable at weird hours. Charlie's expressions cycle between horny and confused and honestly same.

• big tits
• celebrity
• humor
• parody
• charlie