Undercover

Another bugged mess that somehow keeps me clicking. The premise is simple enough, right? Some undercover agent infiltrated your base, and you gotta figure out who it is by, well, stripping suspects. A Fallout cosplay flavored arcade shooter where the bullets are replaced by... clothing removal. Sounds like a fever dream a modder had after too much Nuka-Cola. The shooting feels like you're aiming through molasses. Hit detection is a cruel joke. I emptied a whole clip into what I thought was a synth infiltrator's shoulder pad and her belt buckle just vanished. Then her tactical vest phased through her torso for a solid three seconds before the game remembered gravity exists. The real model integration is the only thing that keeps this from being a complete dumpster fire. The actress they got for the "raider" character, she has this smirk during the striptease sequence that's more convincing than the entire rest of the codebase. But then her hair clips through her own collar and the immersion shatters like a cheap glass bottle. Why is the physics engine having a seizure every time a piece of clothing drops? I don't know. The devs probably don't know either. There's this one moment in the second level where you corner a suspect in a control room. The lighting is actually decent, all red emergency glow, and you're supposed to "interrogate" by landing shots on specific target zones. The bra strap has its own health bar. I'm not kidding. It takes like four direct hits and the damn thing just stretches into infinity for a frame before popping off. It's so janky it circles back around to being hilarious. I wish the arcade scoring system wasn't so busted though. Getting a "Perfect Uncover" bonus feels completely random, like the game just flips a coin. The striptease animations are clearly mocapped by someone who knew what they were doing, but the transition between "armed and dangerous" and "embarrassed nudity" is a single jittery frame. It's like watching a slideshow made by a horny intern. The whole thing runs in browser, obviously, so you can feel the memory leaks in your soul. The audio is a mix of stock gunfire and what I swear are moans ripped from another, better game. During the final "boss" strip, the model's dog tags floated six inches off her chest for the entire sequence. I couldn't stop staring at it. That bug is now a feature in my mind. Don't even get me started on the reload mechanic. Or rather, the lack of one. You just click endlessly. My finger hurts. The cosplay outfits are surprisingly accurate to the source material though, before you shred them off with your cursed cursor. That vault suit texture was almost too good for this trainwreck. Almost.

• arcade
• shooter
• erotic
• real model
• fallout