Dick Leader

Right so the whole thing is a shooter but not really. You got this dildo-rocket, yeah, and you're firing it at planets that are supposedly virgins. The logic is already falling apart in my head but whatever, I'm here for it. The models are real, that's the hook. Actual women doing this weird striptease thing between levels. A blonde one and a brunette. They just sort of... peel off clothes while you're trying to line up shots. It's so jarring it loops back around to being funny. The shooting itself is bare bones arcade stuff. Move left, move right, dodge some incoming whatever. I died three times in a row because I was distracted by the brunette's little smirk during her animation. She knows. She absolutely knows what she's doing to my aim. The lesbian tag is there because the two models get real close sometimes. Not a complaint. Just an observation. I wish the rocket had more weight to it. Feels like a floating cursor. But then again, you're not here for the tight gunplay mechanics, are you? The whole thing feels like someone found a bunch of footage from a late night cable show and built a game around it. The erotic part is so upfront it's almost clinical. No buildup, just here's a tit, now shoot the planet. I kept waiting for some hidden scene or a secret fourth model to unlock but no. What you see is what you get. The arcade loop is addictive in a brain off kind of way. I caught myself playing for way longer than I planned, not even horny, just chasing a higher score while a pixelated dildo sailed past a nipple. The disconnect is the real experience.

• brunette
• lesbian
• real model
• shooter
• strip