Deep Vault 69 v0.6.3

Oh, another vault dweller fantasy. I've seen this setup more times than I've cleaned my keyboard, and that's saying something. The whole "you're a survivor in a comfortable vault" thing, then going to the surface. Fine. Whatever. But this one's got that wasteland parody energy where everyone wants to fuck instead of fight, and honestly? I'm not mad at it. The footjob scenes caught me off guard. Not my thing usually, but the way the vault girl slides her bare foot up your leg during that first encounter, the animation's choppy as hell but somehow that makes it hotter. Like watching scrambled porn channels back in the day. You know what I mean. The turn based combat is basically a delivery system for losing clothes, and I spent way too long letting enemies hit me just to see what happens next. The big tits on the mechanic character, the one with the wrench, they bounce wrong. Physics are completely broken. I laughed out loud and then kept playing for three hours. The lesbian voyeurism scene in the abandoned diner, you hide behind the counter and watch two raiders go at it. The dialogue is so bad it circles back to brilliant. "Your vault suit looks tight, let me loosen it." Who writes this stuff? The futa content appears about halfway through, completely out of nowhere. No warning. One minute you're trading bottle caps, next minute there's a surprise that would make a super mutant blush. The sandbox elements let you completely ignore the main quest, which I did, obviously. Just wandering around finding increasingly ridiculous oral sex scenarios. The mobile port runs like garbage but I can't stop. The harem management is basically nonexistent, characters just show up and stay forever, like stray cats. The interracial scenes feel randomly inserted, no buildup, just "here's this now." The point and click interface sometimes doesn't register, so you're just poking at a thigh for thirty seconds while the character repeats the same line. "Is that a stimpak or are you happy to see me?" No, it's my finger, you broken mess of a game. I hate it. I'm going to play more.

• point and click
• masturbation
• footjob
• harem
• oral