Concave Billiard

God I wish this had a proper undo button. Not the rewind thing that just resets the whole table, but like a real "oops I didn't mean to tap there" button. Because sometimes my thumb just twitches and the ball goes flying into a dimple I wasn't aiming for and now she's putting her jacket back on and I'm sitting here like an idiot. The whole thing runs in browser which is convenient I guess but the physics feel like they were coded by someone who's only ever seen a pool table in a dream. Balls don't roll so much as they teleport with a sliding animation. And the blonde, she's wearing this tight uniform thing that's clearly meant to be some kind of referee or sports bar outfit but the stripes on the sleeves are wrong, like they're going the opposite direction of what actual referee shirts have. Not that I'm an expert on referee fashion but you notice things when you're staring at a screen waiting for clothes to come off. Speaking of which the striptease progression is weirdly paced. You'll sink three balls in a row and nothing happens, then miss one and suddenly she's removing her top like she's rewarding failure. Makes no sense. The arcade elements are there, the whole press to roll mechanic is simple enough, but the hitboxes on the dimples feel off by like two pixels. You think you've lined up a perfect shot and the ball just clips through the edge and keeps going. Meanwhile she's standing there with this blank expression that's supposed to be seductive but just looks like she's reading a terms of service agreement. Real model my ass. She's real in the sense that someone filmed a person once, but the looping animations are so stiff it might as well be a mannequin. There's this one frame where her arm bends at an angle that makes me genuinely concerned for her elbow joint. Still, I kept playing. Not because it's good, but because I wanted to see if there was some secret final state or something. Spoiler: there isn't. Just more billiard balls and that same dead eyed stare.

• blonde
• uniform
• striptease
• erotic
• billiard